The subtitle of this book (“How to succeed in every business and social encounter”) gives a clue about how much information Tonya Reiman has amassed. She states that as much as 93 percent of our interpersonal communication is nonverbal. The book is about both how to read others’ nonverbal messages and how to control your body to achieve your goals.

Her “five immutable truths of body language” explain her passion:

1. Body language is a constant.
2. Body language is always determined by context.
3. Body language can never be judged based on one single signal.
4. Body language reveals the discrepancies between what a person says and what a person truly believes.
5. Body language mastery allows you to tune in to “microexpressions,” the brief flashes or gestures that betray inner feelings.

Until reading the book, I had considered myself good at paying attention to body language. For example, the next time you’re in a group of people who are talking, look at the direction people’s feet are pointing. If a person’s feet are pointing away from the group, they are no longer engaged.

She has chapters on the language of: the face (including reading emotion, lip gestures, nose and chin expressions, etc.), the body (hands, torso, arms), of space and touch (the four zones of space and the 14 social touches), and sound (vocal cues). Additionally, she has a wealth of information on secret signals and first impressions. Each chapter also contains what the language means (“What to watch for”) and how to use it for your personal benefit (“What you should work on”). As she describes, the information can be used to both build rapport and/or manipulate people.

The book isn’t a casual read – it’s more like a study course. Read about a gesture or two, go into a social situation, and watch for it (in context). It’s another great skill to have in your social toolkit.