(Photo by woodleywonderworks)

I recently heard the story about a person who teaches conflict resolution classes to high school teens. In one of his classes, he asked the boys if they would like to learn a line that will always “work” to “get” a girl. They were extremely interested, and leaned in for the magic words.

He said, “So, what do you think?” They were dumbfounded, expecting to hear something about commenting someone on their looks. But what creates a connection with someone (especially with someone used to being talked at) is the opportunity to be listened to.

In your own marketing, if you’re talking at someone, you’re likely to not get the results you’re looking for. We’re all busy. We’re all behind on our to-do lists. We’re often too short-term focused to achieve long-term goals. We’re head down looking at our internet screens. But underneath it all, we’re all human. And as humans, we want to be “seen”. We want people to really take the time to understand what we’re thinking and needing. And ultimately, we want help to achieve our goals.

The next time you talk with a prospective client, include their perspective in your sales pitch. Ask them what they think about an issue/problem and really listen to their answer. The truth may not be what they said, but what values/needs are underneath their question. Being a good listener involves more than simply nodding your head sagely. It requires actively paying attention to all the signals, asking leading questions, and patiently waiting for the deeper connection. You’re not a therapist, but you are providing a therapeutic service. Give your (prospective) clients the true gift of  dialoguing with you.

Remember: You can’t sell a solution if you don’t really understand what the problem is.